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A bit of an adapting background artist with an interest in candid style scenery



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Joined on 4/22/21

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I look like a flower vase that someone stuck straw in...

Posted by Nootle - May 18th, 2021

This is what happens when you get blonde hair wet.

Comments (3)

oh... ok



Don't even talk to me about hair.

First off: I got like three different hair types. It starts out straight, then transitions into wavy, until it starts curling with the curls getting progressively tighter as the hair goes on. Needless to say, finding a shampoo that works perfectly for me is a task not possible in this world or any other.

Second off: You can only brush it in the shower. God help you if you forget. I swear, you go one day without brushing it, and congratulations, you have created a Gordian Knot. But hey, some people enjoy spending 15 extra minutes in the shower and using a cup of conditioner, all for the luxury of being able to run your hand through your hair. When wet. And only when wet. Which segues nicely into...

Third off: It takes forever to dry. But after about an hour, it starts to get dry enough and begins to fluff. And after a few hours, it gets to a point that can only be described as “Ideal Fluffiness.” That is until it keeps going. Indeed, as the day progresses, it just continues to fluff. So if you're trying to aim for a particular fluff level, you need to plan your day accordingly.

Fourth off: You get too many compliments. Some might not see this as a bad thing, but people often fail to take into account “The Ego.” If an ego is fed too much, it will always seek to devour it's host, like a pig or pig adjacent creature. Should this occur, you cannot escape your fate of becoming a pretentious jackass that can't take criticism. I live in constant fear of this.

And Finally off: The wind. If a single gust of wind comes your way, it's over. You're done. Any effort you put into your hair can all be undone in a single unpredictable moment. You'll still get compliments, but deep down, you'll know it's not perfect, and you'll have to carry that knowledge around with you for like a whole day. Heartbreaking stuff, to say the least.

So curse not your hair. For it can be so much more worse.

Also, it's pretty neat to have your hair be two feet long and only go to your shoulders.

Someone who can speak in such an manner, filled to the brim with sport and hurt, all to compliment a single post consisting of no more than 10 words in its description, I can respect to the outmost highest level to be known. There was no rime or reason that my post-shower complaint deserved such a display of outcry and educational diction, but I have been honored with the light of new information regarding such and I have not been disappointed. It is without lie, the mop on my head that I was born with could never dare be called a hassle, especially with the knowledge and comparison that such struggle and pain be put into your efforts maintaining such a beast. I applaud you for your victories and trials, my dear connoisseur of curls. I shall finalize and send off this retort with the best of luck to you and may you make peace with your ever changing, troublesome and likely impressive locks. Thank you for making my evening.

-Kindly, The Straw Bouquet.